Dear Blogtards,

Posted Tuesday, June 6th, 2006 at 12:02 am by MJG

Do not push this man's head into a turnbuckle. It will not have the desired effect.«This is you, Blogger McDumbblog. Hideo Kojima has been saying that the next Metal Gear game will be his last since before Sons of Liberty was released.

I think it’s safe not to tell people he’s said it again, no matter how much I wish he would get a multi-picture deal beyond his Metal Gear movie, so it would actually happen and he could do something he’s better at.

Rebukefully,
MJG

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One Response to “Dear Blogtards,”

  1. Bezzy Says:
    June 6th, 2006 at 5:56 pm

    Please, no-one tell him about HalfLife 2: Osbudsman 1’s developer commentary feature! It’ll be like a Guy Richie commentary, but with even more millions of maddonna monkeys typing and shitting and typing shit!

    Here’s a sample of things to come (taken from the Adam and Joe XFM podcasts, “Crap Commentry Corner” segment):

    “Okay, the… the chess game. The chess board has many mystical meanings. The temple of Solomon was checkered like a chess board. 64 squares and 32 pieces. One of my metaphors here is that, essentially, life is a chess game - everything’s chess. Chess is everything. Ultimately, you’re only playing yourself. The projection is that you’re playing on the board, and the environment IS the board. If you stay on that board, you’ll always remain vunerable.”

    DO YOU NOT SEE?? It gets better, too:

    “There’s three columns going on. Green’s the central column. White is right column. Black is left column. [Interviewer: Right, can you explain that… what… what that means?] Right, everything manifests in processes of three: Proton, neutron, electron. Sun, Earth, Moon. Masculine, feminine… child. Positive, negative, and filament. White bloodcells are mercy. Red bloodcells are judgement. All the environments do represent left column or right column energy. [Interviewer: Okay, alright, okay].”

    So, undeniable evidence there that Kojima is Guy Richie and Madonna’s child brought back from the future after a psychological time travel experiment became corrupted by the illuminati or probably Tom Hanks and the Mona Lisa in an off shore Aquadome filled with the world’s greatest scientists and popstars, all intent on seeing whether or not there really WAS a Troy or if it was just an ancient meme which Homer made up, and everyone in the Roman forums just wouldn’t fucking drop, and it no longer became funny and that’s the real reason why Rome fell, and why you can’t get a burger that looks like the one in the advert.

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