Right now, in terms of effort-to-pay ratio, it seems like the best job in the games industry is to be a lawyer for the Entertainment Software Association.

You get to go from state to state as each of them sign their Grand Theft Auto Is Bad bills into law, and point out that there’s no laws restricting the sales of Andrew Dice Clay CDs or DVDs to minors, and he’s not even funny. And then you’re done and you get lots of money, because lawyering is hard work. You’ll lose your job someday because eventually the ESRB will get its act together and word will get out to the politicians that there’s these new things called parents that are very good for making kids not see human-shaped collections of triangles have sex with and kill each other.

In the meantime, you got a steady docket of easy wins for the next few years, which is the only reason why you ESA lawyers win over the highly competitive effort-to-pay-wise, but much more time-limited job “George Broussard”. Well, maybe not the only reason— it’s possible that some of you don’t have to pay a woman to pretend you’re not a repellent bemulleted man-child.

But regardless, that’s why there’s no Jack Thompson says this or Oklahoma governor signs that on Metafuture. There’s no real story until the ESA lawyers lose one of these easy-peasy 1st Amendment challenges. “Mailman Delivers Mail” isn’t a headline.

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